me when I first joined tumblr:
lol I probably won't ever use this
Why am I so fucking useless :/
“For my wedding, he gave me three petrified dragon eggs. He believed - the world believed - the ages had turned them to stone. How many centuries had it been since dragons roamed the skies? But I dreamt that if I carried those eggs into a great fire they would hatch. When I stepped into the fire, my own people thought I was mad. But when the fire burned out, I was unhurt. The mother of dragons.”
remember that time when tony stark made a boner joke
#TO THE GOD OF MISCHIEF NO LESS #what’s even funnier here #is the fact that in norse mythology #loki was associated with rampant sexuality and boning everything that moved #and sometimes things that didnt #(most trickster figures are in fact associated with lots of sex) #but the point im making here #is that tony stark is implying that loki #god of mischief #can’t get it up #idk it made me laugh my ass off
So my parents just found out about my fourteen year old brother smoking weed because they found this on his window ledge. So in the middle of a huge lecture my dad decides to open the Baggie and smell it to see how strong it is. He immediately starts crying with laughter. THIS NIGGA HAS BEEN BUYING AND SMOKING FUCKING OREGANO. FUCKIN ITALIAN HERBS. SON. I CAN’T. I CANNOT. I CAN’T DO THIS.